In another example of political correctness gone insane, a clown named Flasher has been banned from the Walnut Festival, Walnut Creek's annual carnival, after working the event for the past thirty years. He was escorted out of the parade in September, and they recently let him know that he's not allowed to participate in this year's event either. What could have possibly caused them to ban the poor guy after all those years of loyal service? According to the Walnut Festival administration, his act (which hasn't changed since he first started doing it in 1973) is now too risqué for the family event.

Here's what his "shocking" routine consisted of: Flasher would walk around the Walnut Festival in his clown makeup, wearing a long blue trenchoat. He would approach the crowds, then throw open his coat to reveal a small dog peeking out of the top of his trousers. Kids loved it, and it gave Flasher (whose real name is Bob Manion) a chance to entertain the locals with his dog.

"It's just amazing what this guy does," says Robert Menary, the parade's chairman. "It was probably OK in the early days, when he did it 28 years ago. But to even be called Flasher the Clown today is too much."

Will somebody explain to me how something can be offensive in 2001 when it didn't offend anyone in 1973? If the moral decay of America is as prevalent as everybody says it is, why are we growing more prudish as a society? If a 59 year old man wants to dress up as a clown and make kids laugh at his dog, that's his fucking right. Walnut Creek people have a reputation for being snobbish elitists, and this is just another example of the rampant censorship that takes place in that town.

I'm not alone in this opinion, either. Flasher The Clown has participated without incident in San Francisco's Columbus Day, St. Patrick's Day and Veterans Day parades since the 1980s. Take a look at what Renie Champaign, San Francisco's parade director, had to say about the Walnut Festival organizers:

"I don't know why those people in Walnut Creek are up on their high horses," he said. "They've got some kooky people running that parade. It's not like he's showing his genitals."

I couldn't agree more. As far as I'm concerned, the folks at the Walnut Festival have two choices: they can let Flasher The Clown participate in the parade this year, or they can face the wrath of BobFreemanShow.com. If Flasher is denied entrance to the parade, we will be there to protest... and if the people of Walnut Creek were offended by Flasher, they damn sure don't want to meet us. If those snobs need something to be offended by, and it looks like they do, I can help them out with that - and I guarantee, I'm a damn side more controversial than a clown in a trenchcoat.

Now, it should be noted that I have never personally met Bob Manion, and he has no idea that we're launching this protest in his defense - but honestly, we're going to do this whether he wants us to or not. This is bigger than Flasher The Clown, this is bigger than the Walnut Festival, and this is bigger than the entire city of Walnut Creek...

This is about America, freedom, and the right to let a dog hang out in your trousers.