Hey everybody.

Is it just me or is most modern day R&B is really, really horrible? No, it's not just me. Most current R&B artists are fucking retards - and I don't mean that in the "they are playfully dumb" sense of the word "retard," I mean that in the complete Down Syndrome, Special Olympics, you-look-funny-when-you-run-but-society-says-I-shouldn't-laugh-while-you-do-it, simpleton stinkin' retard.

By the way, off the subject for a moment, but if I was an actor who was hired to play a retard in a movie or TV show, I would HATE Chris Burke. Remember him? That retarded fellow who played Corky on "Life Goes On"? If somebody hired me to play a retard in a film or on a show, I would HATE Chris Burke's retarded ass. Look at the way everybody always praised him for his "Corky" character - "What a good actor you are, Chris! Great scene, Chris! Way to go, Chris!"

Yet did Sean Penn get any praise for his portrayal of a retard in that "I Am Sam" flick? No! Did Juliette Lewis get respect for her role as the retarded broad in "The Other Sister"? No, critics hated that flick too! So critics don't like movies where... uh... regular actors play retards. Okay, point taken. So why do critics respect films where pretty girls play ugly broads? Like "Monster," for instance, when Charlize Theron played the lesbian (and yes, a butch one) serial killer. Or "Frida," when Salma Hayek played an ugly twat with a unibrow. This double standard is an OUTRAGE! If unretarded actors are panned for their roles as retards, then pretty ladies need to be given bad reviews when they play ugly broads! It's only fair!

Anyway, what was my original point? Oh yeah! Modern R&B is retarded!

Here's a portion of "Get It Shawty" by Lloyd, #8 on this week's Billboard's Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs:

your body lookin' right
your're type I like
and, I'm pursuin'
so can I get a little closer
so I can get to know you and exchange names and thangs
before the night is over, uh

All I really want is
for you to back it up
go on and put your weight on it
cause it's alright
do what you wanna
make me believe ya
ooh I wanna see ya

Get it shawty
get it shawty
get it shawty
Get it shawty
get it shawty
get it shawty

I don't know much about R&B singing sensation Lloyd, because I'm not a drunk slut at a prom about to have my cunt pumped full of chlamydia, but if that "song" was written by anything other than a retard, I would be shocked.

Anyway, that's a retard song and only retards would like it, yet I bet there will be women in the year 2009 who, married to fat, abusive men, long for their single days as club sluts. And I bet those same slits do Google searches on "Lloyd" and find nothing, since he'll be forgotten in less than a month, and I bet the confused cunts eventually stumble onto this page, due to Google Cache.

And here is my message to you, future slut:

"The wrists? Slit 'em."

Get it shawty.

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